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OzCorka
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PostSubject: Jokes Thread   Fri Apr 09, 2010 1:55 am

Post your jokes in here everyone
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Bartel
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Fri Apr 09, 2010 9:22 am

Knock-knock.
Whos there?
Me.
Come in.

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Jammy
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Tue Apr 20, 2010 7:31 pm

If the following joke freaks you out, don't worry...It happened to a lot of peoplez Razz

A girl wants a new laptop so she asks her dad for the money. His dad says no so she says 'I'll do anything for it'. He goes, okay 'suck my dick'. So she pulls down his pants and she goes 'dad, you penis stinks of shit'. Her dad goes 'don't worry about that, you mother wanted an xBox'.

Razz
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Daniel0308
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Wed Apr 21, 2010 11:15 am

We have a teacher at our school who has the worst jokes...

Someone asked him, "Hey sir, what's the joke of the day!"

He replied, "You." Neutral

Weird...
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Jammy
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Wed Apr 21, 2010 9:38 pm

Yeah, I hate it when teachers try to be cool. A teacher once said 'safe, then Muhammad' and I was like 'no sir, you just don't do that' Razz
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Choob
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Wed Apr 21, 2010 10:52 pm

A man walks into a bar with an orange for a head. He asks for a pint. The barman says "Sure thing, I hope you don't mind me asking, but why do you have an orange for a head?" The man replies "Well I was away travelling for a while, in the desert, when I came across a lamp. I rubbed it and a genie popped out. He said he could grant me three wishes, and explained all the rules and that. So I said 'Genie, I wish that I had infinite wealth, so money will never be an issue again'. The genie said ' No problem mate'. My second wish was that I could be irresistable to the opposite sex, he granted me this as well. 'And finally genie, I wish that I had an orange for a head'"
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Jammy
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Thu Apr 22, 2010 12:28 am

^Am I missing something here? bounce
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Choob
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Thu Apr 22, 2010 12:59 am

I realised after that it doesn't really work written down bounce It's a short shaggy dog story basically.
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Jammy
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Thu Apr 22, 2010 1:11 am

Ahh, lol okay :L

A man walks into a bar. Ouch!

(yeah, my sense of humor fails when I'm tired) No
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Daniel0308
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Thu Apr 22, 2010 10:58 am

I was gonna say that! Razz

Did you hear the one about the computer that made children disappear? It had a Paedo File. Very Happy
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pdiddy ;)
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Thu Apr 22, 2010 2:09 pm

I HAVE LIKE THE BEST JOKE EVER

why did the chicken cross the road?

i bet you havent heard this one

to get to the other side

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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Pav
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Mon May 10, 2010 11:59 am

Why did Justin Bieber get his dick stuck in an ATM?

Because it told him to insert PIN here! Razz

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Liverpool101
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Mon May 10, 2010 3:57 pm

A fat chick served me at maccas and when she brought me my food she said sorry about the weight and i replyed its okay you fat bitch you will loose it.
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Jammy
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Mon May 10, 2010 7:49 pm

This following one ain't directed at anyone in particular but I laughed so much when I heard it first time Razz

Your momma's so stupid that she got locked into Tesco's and starved to death! Laughing
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Angelgirl23
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Thu Mar 24, 2011 9:07 am

At the Cedar Rapids Chamber of Commerce meeting the treasurer reported a deficit of two hundred dollars.
One of the chamber members stood up and said,
"I vote that we donate half of it to the Red Cross and then give the other fifty dollars to the Salvation Army”.

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Thu Mar 24, 2011 10:04 am

Well today when I was an umpy (Very Happy) for some little kids at cricket, a guy bowled at about 20k's with a bouncy tennis ball and he got hit in the nuts, it was 'apparently' such a big deal, that he had to get people to carry him off the pitch Laughing.

I know it's not a joke, but I just like felt sharing that with you's Very Happy.
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YippeKayye
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Thu Mar 24, 2011 10:15 am

I put some body spray on last night, but I only managed to pull Anne Robinson.

It must have been the weakest Lynx.
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OzCorka
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Sat Mar 26, 2011 11:35 pm

Pav wrote:
Why did Justin Bieber get his dick stuck in an ATM?

Because it told him to insert PIN here! Razz


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Exclamation Exclamation Exclamation Exclamation lol!
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Jakey
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Tue Mar 29, 2011 12:29 pm

Yo mamas so fat, she got arrested at the airport for ten pounds of crack. Very Happy
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Choob
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Tue Mar 29, 2011 3:05 pm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HxciIyDf5nU&feature=related

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Issabella
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Fri Oct 21, 2011 1:44 pm

Teacher or professor giving you a hard time? Grab their blackboard chalk and drill a small hole straight down from the writing end, insert a match, and fill the hole with a blend of chalk dust and glue. Put the chalk back and watch the panic when smoke starts to spew!


Last edited by Issabella on Fri Oct 28, 2011 1:27 pm; edited 1 time in total
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NoBallsNoLife
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes Thread   Mon Oct 24, 2011 12:59 am

Hahhaha funny one isabella!
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lisadave
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PostSubject: Girls night out   Mon Nov 14, 2011 1:40 pm


Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.

The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!'
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